Who is in control?

I have been very persistently making efforts for last good about  6 months now,  to find my dream job, wishing it, visualizing it, even seeing myself sitting in that chair, juggling figures on an excel sheet while barking orders on the phone! i have tried all possible ways to generate positive vibes and draw the job to me. Honestly, I don’t even recall the number of nights I spent thinking, wondering, hoping, praying, worrying. But, all to no avail. This evening as I set out for my evening jog,  I began to wonder who controls my life; is it me, my wishlist or a higher power? Do I drive the things happening in my life or am I driven by them. The realization shattered a long-held myth of mine, that I am in control of my life. I curiously explored this thought deeper. I am not able to control the situations from occurring in my life. I am only able to control my response to those situations. I can not pick and choose the people or happenings in my life; albeit, I can only choose how I can handle them, the best way I can. Only in that sense, I can be called the controller of my life. 

So, does that mean I should stop dreaming or wishing? Should I have no goals in life? Certainly not. It just means that I should pursue my goals with sincere, honest efforts. Results are out of my hand. These goals, wishes cannot be the reason I exist. A job is not the reason I exist. A promotion is not the reason I exist. And, these are not the reasons without which I shall perish. I live, simply because I am alive. Its the here and now, the heart beating inside, the rhythmic breathing, the strength in my legs, the glow of health on my face and a sense of peace in the heart. This is what I live for. And these are in my control! As long as the heart beats in its rhythm, as long as the peace fills my soul, as long as I can chin up and face another day, I am in control.

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Author: sukhwinder's thoughts

on the personal front, Sukhwinder is a thinker, a mother of two teenagers and a person who is passionate about life and living. Professionally, Sukhwinder is a human capital builder with more than 20 years’ experience in various aspects of human enterprise & development, administration, Facilities Management. She has worked in various sectors that include Indian Army, IT & Telecom, B-Schools and Facilitation . She is an effective communicator with excellent relationship building & strong analytical aptitude towards problem solving, has a flair for consensus building and crisis management, is an effective leader and proficient people manager. Sukhwinder holds dual Masters’Degrees in Business Administration and Computer Management from University of Pune, Diploma in material management and six sigma certification.

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